Where the Money Resides: A Guide to Houston's Millionaire Hangouts
So, you're curious about where the big bucks brunch? You want to know the secret spots where millionaires mingle and money talks? Well, buckle up, buttercup, because we're about to dive into the glittering world of Houston's elite.
Disclaimer: I'm not rich.
Just to be clear, I'm not one of them. I've never owned a yacht, or even a yacht-sized bathtub. But I have done my research. So, consider this your virtual invitation to the exclusive clubs (well, not really exclusive, but you get the idea).
The Galleria: Where Shopping is a Sport
Let's start with the obvious: The Galleria. This isn't just a mall, it's an experience. It's where you'll find people casually dropping more on a handbag than your monthly rent. But don't be intimidated! Window shopping is free, and people watching is a contact sport. Just don't accidentally bump into someone's Birkin bag.
The Country Clubs: A Whole Different Ball Game
If you're looking for a more laid-back (but still luxurious) vibe, head to one of Houston's many country clubs. Think golf carts, tennis whites, and conversations about oil prices. Don't worry if you don't know how to swing a club - most people are there for the networking anyway. Just remember, keep your eye on the ball, not on their Rolex.
Fine Dining: Where Taste Buds Meet Bank Accounts
Houston has a thriving culinary scene, and the city's top chefs cater to the palates of the wealthy. Restaurants like [insert high-end restaurant names] are where you'll find millionaires sipping expensive wine and discussing art deals. Don't worry if you can't afford the menu - just enjoy the ambiance. And maybe order the water.
The Arts District: Culture and Cash Collide
Houston has a surprisingly vibrant arts scene, and the millionaires are big supporters. You'll find them at museum openings, theater performances, and art auctions. It's a great place to spot a potential sugar daddy (or momma) - just kidding! Or am I?
Where to Avoid: The Great Divide
Now, just because you're curious about the millionaire lifestyle doesn't mean you have to pretend to be one. Avoid places like [insert overly pretentious places]. Trust me, you'll feel more out of place than a cowboy at a vegan convention.
How To...
- How to dress the part: Less is more, unless you're talking about diamonds.
- How to order at a fancy restaurant: Start with the most expensive wine on the list, and work your way down. Just kidding (kind of).
- How to act rich: Confidence is key. Walk slowly, talk slowly, and pretend you're always waiting for your private jet.
- How to spot a millionaire: Look for the people who order their steak cooked "well-done."
- How to make friends with a millionaire: Be yourself. Or at least pretend to be really good at tennis.